Sunday, December 6, 2009

Why FOX sucks

Today's bonus blog is brought to you by CBS, which didn't pay us a nickel but at least provided critical updates and the final result of the NFL game between New Orleans-Washington before FOX (hey, they were only covering the game!)

There are many reasons FOX sucks, of course, many of which are heinous and have been contributing to the demise of our civilization for some time. So to pick a bone over their NFL coverage may seem small. Maybe, but symptomatic of this network's intent to rid the world of, well, the world!

I get the New York-Dallas thing, I really do. Big markets, very impressive. You're going to show that kickoff. OK. Fine. But don't feed us this bullshit about NFL contractual obligations. CBS told us what was going on. Why didn't you? To abandon the Saints-Redskins game completely is criminal. To not break away when the action is stopped, to not at least tell your announcers to update viewers on a game YOU WERE BROADCASTING is criminal. It's tantamount to a war crime, and FOX should suffer the consequences. But, of course, they will proceed with their feeble sports coverage -- we can't include politics now because I'll explode -- with impunity. And there goes our world in the shitter.

Do you know what we saw while the Saints -- one of only two remaining unbeaten teams in the NFL -- were scoring a late touchdown to force overtime, recovering a fumble and kicking a game-winning field goal? We saw the Giants-Cowboys kickoff -- yes!! -- followed by four punts, two timeouts and one of those precious in-booth moments with perhaps the most overblown of NFL announcing crews (Joe Buck and Troy Aikman). With nary a mention of the Saints-Skins game. They did alert us that the second quarter of the Giants-Cowboys "is just around the corner!")

We only knew the Saints sent the game into overtime because CBS showed it. And we only knew the Saints recovered a fumble and won with a field goal because CBS showed it. Only after Dallas had kicked a climactic chip-shot field goal early in the second quarter to take a 3-0 lead did FOX cut away for a "Game Break" and give us the second-hand information about the Saints-Skins.

You stink.


  1. Ouch! Hell, how's that for pithy, at least one swear word and less than 300 words total.

  2. Fox doesn't suck. Fox Sports DOES suck. I also agree with the blog admin on Buck and Aikman. Shitty play-by-play, shittier "color," by a lame-ass, has been whose ego outpaces Namath's by several thousand yards. And, because I'm getting worked up, can the robot crap pre- and post-commercial breaks.
    Fox Network? The only one with the balls to tell it like it is.