Today we reveal our top five Barry Manilow songs. (Just kidding, just kidding!!!)
Seriously, I can only remember two of the crooner's syrupy hits ("Mandy'' and "Copocabana'') and now the day is ruined for me.
Why do we pick on Barry the way we do? We don't talk this way about Clay Aiken (well, probably because we refuse to discuss Clay Aiken.)
Well, enough is enough. Today I have new-found respect for Manilow's music after reading an Associated Press story online (did you know you can get all kinds of cool news on the Internet?) Apparently a mall in the New Zealand town of Christchurch has been having problems with hooligans who congregate there and raise all kinds of hell.
Solution: Pipe in the music of Barry Manilow, and drive them from the premises!!!!! Sort of a reverse Pied Piper strategy.
This really ought to work anywhere.